


maybe time will give us a chance to hold hands again

by galaxylino



Category: Stray Kids (Band)
Genre: Kim Seungmin-centric, M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-01-05
Updated: 2020-01-26
Packaged: 2021-02-27 04:22:04
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 2,714
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22130974
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/galaxylino/pseuds/galaxylino
Summary: Seungmin has lots of dreams and a long list of things he wants to experiment. Expect that, Seungmin doesn’t feel like doing anything. It is as if his body wasn’t functioning anymore, only his mind was there. His life stops. Just like a machine when you turn it off. But Seungmin had Changbin.Changbin always finds the strength to be productive. He cannot stay without doing anything. So he encourages Seungmin to do at least one productive thing per day. Because Changbin doesn’t have a goal in his life nor a dream. His life passes by. Just like a machine when you forgot to turn it off. But Changbin had Seungmin.They are a duo. Both help each other in life. Being each other bestfriend. That’s how it is and how it will always lasts. Until one fall in love.
Relationships: Hwang Hyunjin/Kim Seungmin, Kim Seungmin/Seo Changbin
Comments: 2
Kudos: 13





	1. Chapter 1

Love.  
A complicated word. It never really went through Seungmin’s head before. But lately, he was questioning this small but yet big word. 

“It is only 4 letters. One consonant, one vowel and one consonant and one vowel. Just like a sandwich.” 

The brown haired boy was laying down in his bed, in the dark. Thinking. 

“A sandwich but which kind?”

As far as he can recall, Seungmin doesn’t ever remember falling in love. Of course he knew about it, crushes, butterflies, soulmates and all that jazz. He also knew love towards his parents, teachers, anything. But he never really experimented the romantic feeling of love. It has not been, even once, one of his preoccupations. But the book he was reading the past week, which he just finished one hour ago, made the small boy questioning himself. Time passed by, and Seungmin got lost in his thoughts. 

“Maybe Changbin knows.”

Impatiently, he reached his phone, about to call his dear friend. But he realized it was late at night - or too early in the morning, depends on how you see it. 

“I will ask later.”

And so, Seungmin did what he always do when he cannot sleep: he searches for a new book to read. Books are his get away. From them, a whole new world exist. He can find inspiration from them. He loves very detailed books, with a lot of narrative and description, so he can recreated everything with the help of his imagination. But on top of everything, what Seungmin loves the most about books is that they can, always, connect to himself and doing so, they always give him strength to live his life. Because that’s what Seungmin’s lack of : will of living. He has lots and load of dreams and aspirations, things he wants to try, experiment. But he can barely go outside, and some days, he can’t even leave his bed. So books helps him to live this part of the life he wants to live but which he is unable to.  
Browsing through the very long list of books, the only ones that can catch Seungmin’s attention are related to love. 

And so, Seungmin keeps thinking about what feeling does Love give. In all stories, books and movies, Love seems to be a happy thing.  
He now wished to experiment the sensation of being in love but at the same time, is Love really a good thing ? Seungmin was determined to find out about it. How good can love be ? How bad can love be ? He wants to experiment every single aspect of being in love.

“That’s it, I found a new aspiration.” Happily, the boy grabbed his phone and texted Changbin. 

\----------  
Binnie! Guess what?! I found a new thing I’m wishing to experiment : love. Sleep well, text me when you wake up

With a smile on his face, Seungmin finally fell asleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thank you for reading everything, I hope you enjoyed it ! have a nice day/night (i know it's night)


	2. Chapter 2

When Seungmin woke up, only a few hours passed by. As always, he only had a little amount of sleep. But it doesn’t bother him. He doesn't like to sleep a lot. He rather read a lot and find new aspirations than spending time asleep, as he doesn’t have dreams.  
With his eyes poorly opened, he checks his phone, only to see Changbin’s reply to his late-early text. 

\----------  
u lost ur mind didnt u 

Seungmin puffed and pressed his keyboard only to type two short words : i might 

Hours passed by and Seungmin hasn’t left his bed. He stayed there, reading his newest book : Madame Bovary. The story of a woman kinda desperate with her life, wishing for a romantic one, just like the books she reads. Seungmin admits it, it isn’t the most positive book about love he could find. But, what he likes about this book is that, even with happy things, the human being can wish for things they don’t have. And doing so, they end up unsatisfied with the things they have. Just like Emma does. 

Seungmin started to wonder if he wasn’t being too greedy. But Changbin didn’t let him to form this thought in his mind. The dark haired boy jumped on his friend’s bed, disturbing him. 

\- Oh, you here.  
\- Of course I am.

Seungmin doesn’t answer back, trying to find the line he stopped at. 

\- So love ? That’s new.  
\- Hm.  
\- And how far is it going ?  
\- Right now ? I only read two books but hey, it sounds amazing. This one isn’t really the happiest but look!!! 

Seungmin spent a while explaining to his friend all his motive, the story of the latest book, how this aspiration came and even explained the book he was reading right now. Changbin was listening to it thoroughly, smiling. 

If there is one thing Changbin loves the most about his best friend is the way he talks. Seungmin has this way of always using the right words, at the right time, for the right thing. Maybe it is something that the taller gained from all the books he reads, but Changbin believe it is an inner quality he always had. Since a child, Seungmin has always been like that.

While hearing his best friend talking about love, he realized something hidden at the bottom of himself. Something he never wanted to come into light. 

\- Eeh, are you even listening to me ?  
\- Yeaaaaaa  
\- Liar you weren’t! You’re the worst friend I have, I can’t believe this.  
\- And the only one. 

Seungmin grabbed his pillow and throw it at his friend’s face. The pillow fight started and lasted until someone rang the bell. Both of them stopped laughing and paused all their movements, watching each other in the eyes, waiting to see if the doorbell rings again. But all they could hear was a car honking. A few minutes later, they burst out laughing, laying back in the bed. 

\- Seungmo, are you going to try to date someone?  
\- Are you crazy?  
\- You’re the crazy one that wants to experience love, remember?  
\- Maybe.  
\- Wait really ? 

The only reply Changbin’s got is a small shoulder movement. A sign he shouldn't keep the conversation going. 

\- What do you have to eat i am hungry, lunch time already passed and I haven't eaten yet, have you?  
\- Haven’t and I am not hungry. Go to the grocery store, you pig. 

Changbin threw his friend’s book on his face and went up, on his way to the entrance. 

\- Remember one productive thing.  
\- It’s only 2pm can I breathe. 

And then Changbin left the apartment. Seungmin found himself in peace, alone his book and managed to go back being lost between the lines.  
The night was all set up when Seungmin realised his friend hasn’t come back. Grabbing his phone, he notices the message the smaller sent. 

\----------  
Something came up and I can't come back, one productive thing seungmin, one. 

Pissed, he locked his phone and went home, scretching. He went to the kitchen and did the dishes. Sending a pic to his best friend, whose replied with a big thumbs up emoji. He made himself a sandwich and a cup of tea, ready to go back to his book. The story went pretty bad, he wishes for Emma to be happy. But while ready the fatal pages, someone rang the doorbell, multiple times. Seungmin didn’t answer, he was too scared to move from his seat and his phone was on his bed. “Changbin..”. 

The person became more and more insistent, Seungmin was frightened. He could hear a few words. 

“Please… help… help….”

Seungmin stopped breathing. A heavy sound reasoned all across his apartment, as if someone had collapsed on his door. He had to do something. Hesitant, he went to the door and unlocked it. The door slammed big opened and someone, the face all bloody, fell into Seungmin’s entrance.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i hope it is not too messy and easy to read,,,  
> i also hope you enjoyed this chapter! thank you again for ready and for the 4 kuddos it warms my heart hehehe  
> don't stay up too late!


	3. Chapter 3

Seungmin woke up with the smell of coffee. Something he wasn’t used to. He slowly opened in eyes, scared to see his friend Changbin, in the kitchen, making some coffee. But it wasn't Changbin. There were a tall boy, with shorter shoulder. And then Seungmin remembered. A small sound left his mouth, low but it was enough for the coffee person to hear it and to turn his back, a small smiling face facing Seungmin. 

\- Oh, you’re up ? I hope I’m not the one that woke you up.  
\- I should be the one supposed to ask you this. 

The boy smiled even more. And Seungmin found his heart beating fast, very fast. His cheeks were burning. He escaped the glare of the boy, running in his bathroom. 

Sitting on his closed toilet, Seungmin tries to sort out the situation. 

One week ago, someone, his face all bloody, fell into his house. A paper in his hand saying these words : please help me, no hospital, secret. Seungmin was scared, really scared. But the adrenaline was more intense. It took a week for the boy to fully wake up and leave the bed. And now he is making coffee in his kitchen. “This is crazy”. 

“What’s crazy ?”, said a voice behind the door. 

Seungmin panicked. He started moving all around his bathroom, not knowing what to do. 

\- Uh.. I can’t find the soap.   
\- Isn’t it your house? 

Touché. Embarrassed, Seungmin opened the door and faced the unknown-known boy. 

\- I must have forgotten to buy a new one.   
\- I see. 

A silence took place between the two. The boy was observing every inch of Seungmin’s face. Seungmin was staring at the floor, not knowing what to do. So many things happened in one week. Many questions were running into the small boy’s head. The biggest one about the taller’s memories.

They stayed like this for a while. It was awkward but, at the same time, both of them found this moment comforting. Seungmin was too shy to raise his head and face the eyes of the taller. Also too shy to say a word. Seungmin wanted to push himself into the taller arms, making sure all this situation was real and the boy was really there. But he didn’t. And the taller broke the ice. 

"My name is Hyunjin" 

Seungmin kept staring at the floor and started to play with his right feet. 

"And yours..?", asked Hyunjin. 

Seungmin realized he had to answer. He took a second, clearing his voice and said his name, smiling. He raised his head and faced the taller. His heart skipped a beat. 

One week. During this specific week, Seungmin was enveloped into a comforting feeling. The unknown boy, being too hurt, spent the week into two states : the first one; sleeping, and the second one; talkative but weak. They talked a lot. Seungmin was taking care of him, helped him to feed himself, to drink, but also healed his wound. They talked a lot about books. Seungmin easily confessed to him. He found a warm feeling into the stranger. It was easy to open up. He also belived Hyunjin was feeling the same way towards him. He also asked Changbin to not come until he allows him. He wanted to stay alone with the taller. It was his secret garden.

One week. During this specific week, Seungmin discovered how it feels to be in love. 

But now, as he was facing Hyunjin, he realized Hyunjin was lost. His eyes were empty and confused. If Hyunjin had any memory of the week, he wouldn’t have asked for his name. 

One minute. During this specific minute, Seungmin discovered how it feels to be heartbroken. 

They shared each other’s life during the week and many memories. But only one person remembers everything.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i hope you enjoyed reading it! it might seem quite confusing but it's just i wanted to separate the whole chapter for whatever reason, thank you for reading, have a nice week <3
> 
> ((also yes, from his bed, Seungmin can see the kitchen.. he's not living in a palace it''s a small studio,,,,, if you're french, oui c'est genre le crous))


	4. Chapter 4

Changbin was eating his cereals when Seungmin called. He stared at his phone, without answering. It has been one week since they last talked to each other, something that never happened since a long time. Changbin remembers well that time. It was when Seungmin decided to drop out of school. And it was a horrible period, for both of them. 

Changbin knows well something big had happened in his best friend’s live. But he is uncertain about how big it can be, but also about what it can be. That’s why he was scared to answer. He knows it was something happy, something nice. And he was kinda hurt that Seungmin put him aside. After all, aren’t them supposed to be best friend? Why would Seungmin text him, telling him not to contact him until he allows it? What could have happened to Seungmin that Changbin wasn’t allowed to know? So many questions and not a single answer. Changbin had to spend the week worried, feeling horrible. He was really angry against Seungmin, but seeing his friend calling him made the angry part disappear. He just wanted to answer and to finally hear his best friend’s voice. And this made Changbin angry against himself. Why couldn’t he stay mad against Seungmin? Why is his heart all smooth while looking at Seungmin’s display name, calling him? 

Closing his eyes, taking a deep breath, Changbin touched the small green circle, smiling. 

“Oh so you remember my existence !”, said Changbin, giggling.

Changbin expected to hear his friend giggling back and to joke back. But what Changbin heard made his smile leaving his face. Seungmin was crying. All Changbin wished right now was to run to his friend’s house, but would he be allowed to? All nervous, he asked if he could come over. Between two snobs, the youngest gave him the permission to and rang off. Changbin grabbed his coat and shoes, and ran to his bus stop. He arrived 15 minutes later, opened the door with the hidden key in the flower pot beside the door. With only a first step inside the house, Seungmin ran into his arms, crying harder than ever. They sat on the floor, Seungmin face buried into his best friend's chest. Time passed by, Changbin hasn’t said a single word, Seungmin hasn’t stopped crying. The warmth and the tears of the youngest against his chest reassured the older. He sure is a baby. He also hoped it wasn’t something too serious. 

They spent the whole day like this. Seungmin stopped crying but wasn’t ready to talk nor to open his eyes. All his energy was drained. He felt relieved in his friend’s arms, as if nothing bad could happen. Maybe if he allowed his friend to step inside his secret garden, things would have turned out differently. He doesn’t know and he will never know. 

It was really dark inside Seungmin house. Changbin was hungry and needed to go to the restroom, but he was too scared to break his friend’s comfort. But time kept passing by, Seungmin is snoring and Changbin has to pee. 

“Nevermind.”

Changbin tried to carry his friend to his bed, but lifting him was harder than he thought. After all, Seungmin was way taller than him. He opened his eyes and looked up at Changbin’s. The only thing that went through Changbin’s head while looking into his friend’s eyes was that they were empty. Something broke his friend really badly. His reflex was to hug again the youngest, but this time, Changbin was the one crying. He felt so sorry. 

Seungmin was really shocked to hear his friend crying in his arms. He was the one whose heart was broken but nevertheless, his friend’s tears are wetting his shirt. That scared him. For the past week, he hasn’t thought about the tiny boy. He was too happy to be with Hyunjin that he forgot Changbin was there. He only called Changbin as soon as Hyunjin left because he needed him, when he banned him the whole week. “What a bastard move” said Seungmin to himself. And so, he started crying, hugging his friend and saying continuously sorry to him. 

A few moments after this, Changbin broke the embrace, went to the restroom and drank a glass of water. He sat on the taller bed, signaling his friend to sit there too. Seungmin followed the order. They look at each other saying nothing. Both of them too scared to start talking. But they needed to talk and so, Changbin first broke the ice. 

\- You have to explain everything, you know.  
\- And I will.

Taking a deep breath, Seungmin whipped his tears off his cheeks and started his long long story.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> yes you right next update is going to be the long long week story the mystery is disappearing soon <3  
> also there is a lot of "Changbin Changbin Changbin Seungmin Seugmin Seungmin bestfriend Changbin Changbin" but idk how to call them please bare with it )))):  
> see you next week i'm really impatient to post it ;c have a nice week !


End file.
